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RESTORATION.
The same afternoon, while Donal was reading to Arctura in the
library, there came a loud ringing of the door-bell. Donal ran to
see, and to his great delight, there was mistress Brookes, half wild
with anxious terror.
"Is my leddy safe?" she cried--then clasped Donal in her arms and
embraced him as if he had been her son.
>From the moment she discovered herself fooled, she had been
imagining all manner of terrible things--yet none so terrible as the
truth. There was no end to her objurgations, exclamations,
anathemas, and interjections.
"Now I can leave you in peace, my lady!" said Donal, who had not
resumed his seat.
"Noo ye can bide whaur ye are, an' be thankfu'!" said mistress
Brookes. "Wha daur meddle wi' ye, an' me i' the hoose! An' wha kens
what the mad yerl, for mad I s' uphaud him, an' fit only to be
lockit up--wha kens what he may do neist! Maister Grant, I cannot
lat ye oot o' the hoose."
"I was only going as far as mistress Comin's," replied Donal.
"Weel, ye can gang; but min' ye're hame i' gude time!"
"I thought of putting up there, but I will do as my lady pleases."
"Come home," said Arctura.
Donal went, and the first person he saw when he entered the house
was Eppy. She turned instantly away, and left the room: he could not
help seeing why.
The old woman welcomed him with her usual cordiality, but not her
usual cheerfulness: he had scarcely noted since her husband's death
any change on her manner till now: she looked weary of the world.
She sat down, smoothed her apron on her knees, gave him one glance
in the face, then looked down at her hands, and said nothing.
"I ken what ails ye, Doory," said Donal; "but i' the name o' him
'at's awa', hearken til me.--The lass is no lost, naither is the
Lord asleep. Yer lamb 's been sair misguidit, sair pluckit o' her
bonny woo', but gien for that she haud the closer by the Lord's
flock, she'll ken it wasna for want o' his care the tod got a grup
o' her. It's a terrible pity for the bonny cratur, disgracin' them
'at aucht her! What for winna yoong fowk believe them 'at speyks
true, but wull believe them 'at tells them little but lees! Still,
it's no as gien she had been stealin'! She's wrangt her puir sel',
an' she's wrangt us a', an' she's wrangt the Lord; but for a' that
ye canna luik doon upon her as upo' the man 'at's grown rich at the
cost o' his neebours. There's mony a gran' prood leddy 'ill hae to
stan' aside to lat Eppy pass up, whan we're 'afore the richteous
judge."
"Eh, but ye speyk like my Anerew!" cried the poor woman, wiping her
old eyes with her rough apron. "I s' do what I can for her; but
there's no hidin' o' 't!"
"Hidin' o' 't!" cried Donal. "The Lord forbid! Sic things are no to
be hidden! Sae lang 's she 's i' the warl', the thing has to be
kenned o' a' 'at come nigh her. She maun beir her burden, puir lass!
The Lord he'll lichten 't til her, but he'll hae naething smugglet
up. That's no the w'y o' his kingdom!--I suppose there's nae doobt
wha?"
"Nane. The Lord forbid!"
Two days after, Mr. Graeme and his sister returned, and at lady
Arctura's request took up their abode at the castle. She told them
that of late she had become convinced her uncle was no longer
capable of attending to her affairs; that he was gone to London;
that she had gone away with him, and was supposed to be with him
still, though she had returned, and he did not know where she was.
She did not wish him to know, but desired for the present to remain
concealed. She had her reasons; and requested therefore as a
personal favour that they would not once or to any one allude to her
being at the castle. Mr. Graeme would in the meantime be so good as
make himself acquainted, so far as possible, with the state of
affairs between her and her uncle.
In the course of the investigations thereupon following, it became
clear that a large portion of the moneys of the estate received by
his lordship were nowise accounted for. Lady Arctura directed that
further inquiry should in the meantime be stayed, but that no more
money should be handed over to him.
For some time the factor heard nothing from his lordship. At length
came instructions as to the forwarding of money, Forgue writing and
his father signing. Mr. Graeme replied, excusing himself as he
could, but sending no money. They wrote again. Again he excused
himself. The earl threatened. Mr. Graeme took no heed. His lordship
continued to demand and threaten, but neither he nor his son
appeared. The factor at length wrote that he would pay no money but
to lady Arctura. The earl himself wrote in reply, saying--had he
been out of the country that he did not know she was dead and six
weeks in her grave? Again the factor did not reply.
Donal rode back to Glashgar, and brought Davie home. Lessons were
resumed, and Arctura took her full share in them.
Soon all about the castle was bustle and labour--masons and
carpenters busy from morning to night. The wall that masked the
windows of the chapel was pulled down; the windows, of stained
glass, with never a crack, were cleaned; the passage under them was
opened to the great stair; lady Arctura had a small sweet-toned
organ built in the little gallery, and the mural stair from her own
room opened again, that she might go down when she pleased to play
on it--sometimes, in south-easterly winds, to listen to the aeolian
harp dreaming out the music of the spheres.
In the process of removing the bed, much of it crumbled to dust. The
carved tester and back were set up, the one over the great
chimney-piece in the hall, the other over that in Arctura's room.
The altar was replaced where the bed had been. The story of the
finding of the lost chapel was written by Donal, and placed by
Arctura among the records of the family.
But it soon became evident that what she had passed through had
exercised a hurtful influence on lady Arctura's health. She was
almost always happy, but her strength at times would suddenly desert
her. Both Donal and mistress Brookes regarded her with some anxiety.
Her organ, to which she gave more labour than she was quite equal
to, was now one of her main delights. Often would its chords be
heard creeping through the long ducts and passages of the castle:
either for a small instrument its tone was peculiarly penetrating,
or the chapel was the centre of the system of the house. On the roof
would Donal often sit listening to the sounds that rose through the
shaft--airs and harmonies freed by her worshipping
fingers--rejoicing to think how her spirit was following the sounds,
guided by them in lovely search after her native country.
One day she went on playing till she forgot everything but her
music, and almost unconsciously began to sing "The Lord is mindful
of his own." She was unaware that she had two listeners--one on the
roof above, one in the chapel below.
When twelve months were come and gone since his departure, the earl
one bright morning approached the door of the castle, half doubting,
half believing it his own: he was determined on dismissing the
factor after rigorous examination of his accounts; and he wanted to
see Davie. He had driven to the stables, and thence walked out on
the uppermost terrace, passing the chapel without observing its
unmasked windows. The great door was standing open: he went in, and
up the stair, haunted by sounds of music he had been hearing ever
since he stepped on the terrace.
But on the stair was a door he had never seen! Who dared make
changes in his house? The thing was bewildering! But he was
accustomed to be bewildered.
He opened the door--plainly a new one--and entered a gloomy little
passage, lighted from a small aperture unfit to be called a window.
The under side of the bare steps of a narrow stone stair were above
his head. Had he or had he not ever seen the place before? On the
right was a door. He went to it, opened it, and the hitherto muffled
music burst loud on his ear. He started back in dismal
apprehension:--there was the chapel, wide open to the eye of
day!--clear and clean!--gone the hideous bed! gone the damp and the
dust! while the fresh air trembled with the organ-breath rushing and
rippling through it, and setting it in sweetest turmoil! He had
never had such a peculiar experience! He had often doubted whether
things were or were not projections from his own brain; he moved and
acted in a world of subdued fact and enhanced fiction; he knew that
sometimes he could not tell the one from the other; but never had he
had the apparently real and the actually unreal brought so much face
to face with each other! Everything was as clear to his eyes as in
their prime of vision, and yet there could be no reality in what he
saw!
Ever since he left the castle he had been greatly uncertain whether
the things that seemed to have taken place there, had really taken
place. He got himself in doubt about them the moment he failed to
find the key of the oak door. When he asked himself what then could
have become of his niece, he would reply that doubtless she was all
right: she did not want to marry Forgue, and had slipped out of the
way: she had never cared about the property! To have their own will
was all women cared about! Would his factor otherwise have dared
such liberties with him, the lady's guardian? He had not yet
rendered his accounts, or yielded his stewardship. When she died the
property would be his! if she was dead, it was his! She would never
have dreamed of willing it away from him! She did not know she
could: how should she? girls never thought about such things!
Besides she would not have the heart: he had loved her as his own
flesh and blood!
At intervals, nevertheless, he was assailed, at times overwhelmed,
by the partial conviction that he had starved her to death in the
chapel. Then he was tormented as with all the furies of hell. In his
night visions he would see her lie wasting, hear her moaning, and
crying in vain for help: the hardest heart is yet at the mercy of a
roused imagination. He saw her body in its progressive stages of
decay as the weeks passed, and longed for the process to be over,
that he might go back, and pretending to have just found the lost
room, carry it away, and have it honourably buried! Should he take
it for granted that it had lain there for centuries, or suggest it
must be lady Arctura--that she had got shut up there, like the bride
in the chest? If he could but find an old spring lock to put on the
door! But people were so plaguy sharp nowadays! They found out
everything!--he could not afford to have everything found out!--God
himself must not be allowed to know everything!
He stood staring. As he stood and stared, his mind began to change:
perhaps, after all, what he saw, might be! The whole thing it had
displaced must then be a fancy--a creation of the dreaming brain!
God in heaven! if it could but be proven that he had never done it!
All the other wicked things he was--or supposed himself guilty
of--some of them so heavy that it had never seemed of the smallest
use to repent of them--all the rest might be forgiven him!--But what
difference would that make to the fact that he had done them? He
could never take his place as a gentleman where all was known! They
made such a fuss about a sin or two, that a man went and did worse
out of pure despair!
But if he had never murdered anybody! In that case he could almost
consent there should be a God! he could almost even thank him!--For
what! That he was not to be damned for the thing he had not done--a
thing he had had the misfortune to dream he had done--God never
interfering to protect him from the horrible fancy? What was the
good of a God that would not do that much for you--that left his
creatures to make fools of themselves, and only laughed at
them!--Bah! There was life in the old dog yet! If only he knew the
thing for a fancy!
The music ceased, and the silence was a shock to him. Again he began
to stare about him. He looked up. Before him in the air hovered the
pale face of the girl he had--or had not murdered! It was one of his
visions--but not therefore more unreal than any other appearance:
she came from the world of his imagination--so real to him that in
expectant moods it was the world into which he was to step the
moment he left the body. She looked sweetly at him! She was come to
forgive his sins! Was it then true? Was there no sin of murder on
his soul? Was she there to assure him that he might yet hope for the
world to come? He stretched out his arms to her. She turned away. He
thought she had vanished. The next moment she was in the chapel, but
he did not hear her, and stood gazing up. She threw her arms around
him. The contact of the material startled him with such a revulsion,
that he uttered a cry, staggered back, and stood looking at her in
worse perplexity still. He had done the awful thing, yet had not
done it! He stood as one bound to know the thing that could not be.
"Don't be frightened, uncle," said Arctura. "I am not dead. The
sepulchre is the only resurrection-house! Uncle, uncle! thank God
with me."
The earl stood motionless. Strange thoughts passed through him at
their will. Had her presence dispelled darkness and death, and
restored the lost chapel to the light of day? Had she haunted it
ever since, dead yet alive, watching for his return to pardon him?
Would his wife so receive him at the last with forgiveness and
endearment? His eyes were fixed upon her. His lips moved tremulously
once or twice, but no word came. He turned from her, glanced round
the place, and said,
"It is a great improvement!"
I wonder how it would be with souls if they waked up and found all
their sins but hideous dreams! How many would loathe the sin? How
many would remain capable of doing all again? But few, perhaps no
burdened souls can have any idea of the power that lies in God's
forgiveness to relieve their consciousness of defilement. Those who
say, "Even God cannot destroy the fact!" care more about their own
cursed shame than their Father's blessed truth! Such will rather
excuse than confess. When a man heartily confesses, leaving excuse
to God, the truth makes him free, he knows that the evil has gone
from him, as a man knows that he is cured of his plague.
"I did the thing," he says, "but I could not do it now. I am the
same, yet not the same. I confess, I would not hide it, but I loathe
it--ten times the more that the evil thing was mine."
Had the earl been able to say thus, he would have felt his soul a
cleansed chapel, new-opened to the light and air;--nay, better--a
fresh-watered garden, in which the fruits of the spirit had begun to
grow! God's forgiveness is as the burst of a spring morning into the
heart of winter. His autumn is the paying of the uttermost farthing.
To let us go without that would be the pardon of a demon, not the
forgiveness of the eternally loving God. But--Not yet, alas, not
yet! has to be said over so many souls!
Arctura was struck dumb. She turned and walked out upon the great
stair, her uncle following her. All the way up to the second floor
she felt as if he were about to stab her in the back, but she would
not look behind her. She went straight to her room, and heard her
uncle go on to his. She rang her bell, sent for Donal, and told him
what had passed.
"I will go to him," said Donal.
Arctura said nothing more, thus leaving the matter entirely in his
hands.
Donal found him lying on the couch.
"My lord," he said, "you must be aware of the reasons why you should
not present yourself here!"
The earl started up in one of his ready rages:--they were real
enough! With epithets of contemptuous hatred, he ordered Donal from
the room and the house. Donal answered nothing till the rush of his
wrath had abated.
"My lord," he said, "there is nothing I would not do to serve your
lordship. But I have no choice but tell you that if you do not walk
out, you shall be expelled!"
"Expelled, you dog!"
"Expelled, my lord. The would-be murderer of his hostess must at
least be put out of the house."
"Good heavens!" cried the earl, changing his tone with an attempted
laugh, "has the poor, hysterical girl succeeded in persuading a man
of your sense to believe her childish fancies?"
"I believe every word my lady says, my lord. I know that you had
nearly murdered her."
The earl caught up the poker and struck at his head. Donal avoided
the blow. It fell on the marble chimney-piece. While his arm was yet
jarred by the impact, Donal wrenched the poker from him.
"My lord," he said, "with my own hands I drew the staple of the
chain that fastened her to the bed on which you left her to die! You
were yet in the house when I did so."
"You damned rascal, you stole the key. If it had not been for that I
should have gone to her again. I only wanted to bring her to
reason!"
"But as you had lost the key, rather than expose your cruelty, you
went away, and left her to perish! You wanted her to die unless you
could compel her to marry your son, that the title and property
might go together; and that when with my own ears I heard your
lordship tell that son that he had no right to any title!"
"What a man may say in a rage goes for nothing," answered the earl,
sulkily rather than fiercely.
"But not what a woman writes in sorrow!" rejoined Donal. "I know the
truth from the testimony of her you called your wife, as well as
from your own mouth!"
"The testimony of the dead, and at second hand, will hardly be
received in court!" returned the earl.
"If after your lordship's death, the man now called lord Forgue
dares assume the title of Morven, I will publish what I know. In
view of that, your lordship had better furnish him with the vouchers
of his mother's marriage. My lord, I again beg you to leave the
house."
The earl cast his eyes round the walls as if looking for a weapon.
Donal took him by the arm.
"There is no farther room for ceremony," he said. "I am sorry to be
rough with your lordship, but you compel me. Please remember I am
the younger and the stronger man."
As he spoke he let the earl feel the ploughman's grasp: it was
useless to struggle. His lordship threw himself on the couch.
"I will not leave the house. I am come home to die," he yelled. "I'm
dying now, I tell you. I cannot leave the house! I have no money.
Forgue has taken all."
"You owe a large sum to the estate!" said Donal.
"It is lost--all lost, I tell you! I have nowhere to go to! I am
dying!"
He looked so utterly wretched that Donal's heart smote him. He stood
back a little, and gave himself time.
"You would wish then to retire, my lord, I presume?" he said.
"Immediately--to be rid of you!" the earl answered.
"I fear, my lord, if you stay, you will not soon be rid of me! Have
you brought Simmons with you?"
"No, damn him! he is like all the rest of you: he has left me!"
"I will help you to bed, my lord."
"Go about your business. I will get myself to bed."
"I will not leave you except in bed," rejoined Donal with decision;
and ringing the bell, he desired the servant to ask mistress Brookes
to come to him.
She came instantly. Before the earl had time even to look at her,
Donal asked her to get his lordship's bed ready:--if she would not
mind doing it herself, he said, he would help her: he must see his
lordship to bed.
She looked a whole book at him, but said nothing. Donal returned her
gaze with one of quiet confidence, and she understood it. What it
said was, "I know what I am doing, mistress Brookes. My lady must
not turn him out. I will take care of him."
"What are you two whispering at there?" cried the earl. "Here am I
at the point of death, and you will not even let me go to bed!"
"Your room will be ready in a few minutes, my lord," said Mrs.
Brookes; and she and Donal went to work in earnest, but with the
door open between the rooms.
When it was ready,
"Now, my lord," said Donal, "will you come?"
"When you are gone. I will have none of your cursed help!"
"My lord, I am not going to leave you."
With much grumbling, and a very ill grace, his lordship submitted,
and Donal got him to bed.
"Now put that cabinet by me on the table," he said.
The cabinet was that in which he kept his drugs, and had not been
touched since he left it.
Donal opened the window, took up the cabinet, and threw it out.
With a bellow like that of a bull, the earl sprang out of bed, and
just as the crash came from below, ran at Donal where he stood
shutting the window, as if he would have sent him after the cabinet.
Donal caught him and held him fast.
"My lord," he said, "I will nurse you, serve you, do anything,
everything for you; but for the devil I'll be damned if I move hand
or foot! Not one drop of hellish stuff shall pass your lips while I
am with you!"
"But I am dying! I shall die of the horrors!" shrieked the earl,
struggling to get to the window, as if he might yet do something to
save his precious extracts, tinctures, essences, and compounds.
"We will send for the doctor," said Donal. "A very clever young
fellow has come to the town since you left: perhaps he can help you.
I will do what I can to make you give your life fair play."
"Come, come! none of that damned rubbish! My life is of no end of
value to me! Besides, it's too late. If I were young now, with a
constitution like yours, and the world before me, there might be
some good in a paring or two of self-denial; but you wouldn't stab
your murderer for fear of the clasp knife closing on your hand! you
would not fire your pistol at him for fear of its bursting and
blowing your brains out!"
"I have no desire to keep you alive, my lord; but I would give my
life to let you get some of the good of this world before you pass
to the next. To lengthen your life infinitely, I would not give you
a single drop of any one of those cursed drugs!"
He rang the bell again.
"You're a friendly fellow!" grunted his lordship, and went back to
his bed to ponder how to gain the solace of his passion.
Mrs. Brookes came.
"Will you please send to Mr. Avory, the new surgeon," said Donal,
"and ask him, in my name, to come to the castle."
The earl was so ill, however, as to be doubtful, much as he desired
them, whether, while rendering him for the moment less sensible to
them, any of his drugs would do no other than increase his
sufferings. He lay with closed eyes, a strange expression of pain
mingled with something like fear every now and then passing over his
face. I doubt if his conscience troubled him. It is in general
those, I think, who through comparatively small sins have come to
see the true nature of them, whose consciences trouble them greatly.
Those who have gone from bad to worse through many years of moral
decay, are seldom troubled as other men, or have any bands in their
death. His lordship, it is true, suffered terribly at times because
of the things he had done; but it was through the medium of a roused
imagination rather than a roused conscience: the former deals with
consequences; the latter with the deeds themselves.
He declared he would see no doctor but his old attendant Dowster,
yet all the time was longing for the young man to appear: he
might--who could tell?--save him from the dreaded jaws of death!
He came. Donal went to him. He had summoned him, he said, without
his lordship's consent, but believed he would see him; the earl had
been long in the habit of using narcotics and stimulants, though not
alcohol, he thought; he trusted Mr. Avory would give his sanction to
the entire disuse of them, for they were killing him, body and soul.
"To give them up at once and entirely would cost him considerable
suffering," said the doctor.
"He knows that, and does not in the least desire to give them up. It
is absolutely necessary he should be delivered from the passion."
"If I am to undertake the case, it must be after my own judgment,"
said the doctor.
"You must undertake two things, or give up the case," persisted
Donal.
"I may as well hear what they are."
"One is, that you make his final deliverance from the habit your
object; the other, that you will give no medicine into his own
hands."
"I agree to both; but all will depend on his nurse."
"I will be his nurse."
The doctor went to see his patient. The earl gave one glance at him,
recognized firmness, and said not a word. But when he would have
applied to his wrist an instrument recording in curves the motions
of the pulse, he would not consent. He would have no liberties taken
with him, he said.
"My lord, it is but to inquire into the action of your heart," said
Mr. Avory.
"I'll have no spying into my heart! It acts just like other
people's!"
The doctor put his instrument aside, and laid his finger on the
pulse instead: his business was to help, not to conquer, he said to
himself: if he might not do what he would, he would do what he
could.
While he was with the earl, Donal found lady Arctura, and told her
all he had done. She thanked him for understanding her.
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