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AN ENCOUNTER.
I left my uncle's room, and went to my own, to make what preparation I
could for going abroad with him. I got out my biggest box, and put in all
my best things, and all the trifles I thought I could not do without.
Then, as there was room, I put in things I could do without, which yet
would be useful. Still there was room; the content would shake about on
the continent! So I began to put in things I should like to have, but
which were neither necessary nor useful. Before I had got these in, the
box was more than full, and some of them had to be taken out again. In
choosing which were to go and which to be left, I lost time; but I did
not know anything about the trains, and expected to be ready before my
uncle, who would call me when he thought fit.
My thoughts also hindered my hands. Very likely I should never marry
John; I would not heed that; he would be mine all the same! but to
promise that I would not marry him, because it suited such a mother's
plans to marry him to some one else--that I would not do to save my life!
I would have done it to save my uncle's, but our exile would render it
unnecessary!
At last I was ready, and went to find my uncle, reproaching myself that I
had been so long away from him. Besides, I ought to have been helping him
to pack, for neither he nor his arm was quite strong yet. With a heartful
of apology, I sought his room. He was not there. Neither was he in the
study. I went all over the house, and then to the stable; but he was
nowhere, neither had anyone seen him. And Death was gone too!
The truth burst upon me: I was to see him no more while that terrible
woman lived! No one was to know whither he had gone! He had given himself
for my happiness! Vain intention! I should never be happy! To be in
Paradise without him, would not be to be in Heaven!
John was in London; I could do nothing! I threw myself on my uncle's bed,
and lay lost in despair! Even if John were with me, and we found him,
what could we do? I knew it now as impossible for him to separate us that
he might be unmolested, as it was for us to accept the sacrifice of his
life that we might be happy. I knew that John's way would be to leave
everything and go with me and my uncle, only we could not live upon
nothing--least of all in a strange land! Martha, to be sure, could manage
well enough with the bailiff, but John could not burden my uncle, and
could not lay his hands on his own! In the mean time my uncle was gone we
knew not whither! I was like one lost on the dark mountains.--If only
John would come to take part in my despair!
With a sudden agony, I reproached myself that I had made no attempt to
overtake my uncle. It was true I did not know, for nobody could tell me,
in what direction he had gone; but Zoe's instinct might have sufficed
where mine was useless! Zoe might have followed and found Thanatos! It
was hopeless now!
But I could no longer be still. I got Zoe, and fled to the moor. All the
rest of the day I rode hither and thither, nor saw a single soul on its
wide expanse. The very life seemed to have gone out of it. When most we
take comfort in loneliness, it is because there is some one behind it.
The sun was set and the twilight deepening toward night when I turned to
ride home. I had eaten nothing since breakfast, and though not hungry,
was thoroughly tired. Through the great dark hush, where was no sound of
water, though here and there, like lurking live thing, it lay about me, I
rode slowly back. My fasting and the dusk made everything in turn take a
shape that was not its own. I seemed to be haunted by things unknown. I
have sometimes thought whether the spirits that love solitary places, may
not delight in appropriating, for embodiment momentary and partial, such
a present shape as may happen to fit one of their passing moods; whether
it is always the mere gnarled, crone-like hawthorn, or misshapen rock,
that, between the wanderer and the pale sky, suddenly appals him with the
sense of another. The hawthorn, the rock, the dead pine, is indeed
there, but is it alone there?
Some such thought was, I remember, in my mind, when, about halfway from
home, I grew aware of something a little way in front that rose between
me and a dark part of the sky. It seemed a figure on a huge horse. My
first thought, very naturally, was of my uncle; the next, of the great
gray horse and his rider that John and I had both seen on the moor. I
confess to a little awe at the thought of the latter; but I am somehow
made so as to be capable of awe without terror, and of the latter I felt
nothing. The composite figure drew nearer: it was a woman on horseback.
Immediately I recalled the adventure of my childhood; and then remembered
that John had said his mother always rode the biggest horse she could
find: could that shape, towering in the half-dark before me, be indeed my
deadly enemy--she who, my uncle had warned me, would kill me if she had
the chance? A fear far other than ghostly invaded me, and for a moment I
hesitated whether to ride on, or turn and make for some covert, until she
should have passed from between me and my home. I hope it was something
better than pride that made me hold on my way. If the wicked, I thought,
flee when no man pursueth, it ill becomes the righteous to flee before
the wicked. By this time it was all but dark night, and I had a vague
hope of passing unquestioned: there had been a good deal of rain, and we
were in a very marshy part of the heath, so that I did not care to leave
the track. But, just ere we met, the lady turned her great animal right
across the way, and there made him stand.
"Ah," thought I, "what could Zoe do in a race with that terrible horse!"
He seemed made of the darkness, and rose like the figurehead of a frigate
above a yacht.
"Show me the way to Rising," said his rider.
The hard bell-voice was unmistakable.
"When you come where the track forks," I began.
She interrupted me.
"How can I distinguish in the dark?" she returned angrily. "Go on before,
and show me the way."
Now I had good reason for thinking she knew the way perfectly well; and
still better reason for declining to go on in front of her.
"You must excuse me," I said, "for it is time I were at home; but if you
will turn and ride on in front of me, I will show you a better, though
rather longer way to Rising."
"Go on, or I will ride you down" she cried, turning her horse's head
toward me, and making her whip hiss through the air.
The sound of it so startled Zoe, that she sprang aside, and was off the
road a few yards before I could pull her up. Then I saw the woman urging
her horse to follow. I knew the danger she was in, and, though tempted to
be silent, called to her with a loud warning.
"Mind what you are doing, lady Cairnedge!" I cried. "The ground here will
not carry the weight of a horse like yours."
But as I spoke he gave in, and sprang across the ditch at the way-side.
There, however, he stood.
"You think to escape me," she answered, in a low, yet clear voice, with a
cat-like growl in it.
"You make a mistake!"
"Your ladyship will make a worse mistake if you follow me here," I
replied.
Her only rejoinder was a cut with her whip to her horse, which had stood
motionless since taking his unwilling jump. I spoke to Zoe; she bounded
off like a fawn. I pulled her up, and looked back.
Lady Cairnedge continued urging her horse. I heard and saw her whipping
him furiously. She had lost her temper.
I warned her once more, but she persisted.
"Then you must take the consequences!" I said; and Zoe and I made for the
road, but at a point nearer home.
Had she not been in a passion, she would have seen that her better way
was to return to the road, and intercept us; but her anger blinded her
both to that and to the danger of the spot she was in.
We had not gone far when we heard behind us the soft plunging and sucking
of the big hoofs through the boggy ground. I looked over my shoulder.
There was the huge bulk, like Wordsworth's peak, towering betwixt us and
the stars!
"Go, Zoe!" I shrieked.
She bounded away. The next moment, a cry came from the horse behind us,
and I heard the woman say "Good God!" I stopped, and peered through the
dark. I saw something, but it was no higher above the ground than myself.
Terror seized me. I turned and rode back.
"My stupid animal has bogged himself!" said lady Cairnedge quietly.
Deep in the dark watery peat, as thick as porridge, her horse gave a
fruitless plunge or two, and sank lower.
"For God's sake," I cried, "get off! Your weight is sinking the poor
animal! You will smother him!"
"It will serve him right," she said venomously, and gave the helpless
creature a cut across the ears.
"You will go down with him, if you do not make haste," I insisted.
Another moment and she stood erect on the back of the slowly sinking
horse.
"Come and give me your hand," she cried.
"You want to smother me with him! I think I will not," I answered. "You
can get on the solid well enough. I will ride home and bring help for
your horse, poor fellow! Stay by him, talk to him, and keep him as quiet
as you can. If he go on struggling, nothing will save him."
She replied with a contemptuous laugh.
I got to the road as quickly as possible, and galloped home as fast as
Zoe could touch and lift. Ere I reached the stable-yard, I shouted so as
to bring out all the men. When I told them a lady had her horse fast in
the bog, they bustled and coiled ropes, put collars and chains on four
draught-horses, lighted several lanterns, and set out with me. I knew the
spot perfectly. No moment was lost either in getting ready, or in
reaching the place.
Neither the lady nor her horse was to be seen.
A great horror wrapt me round. I felt a murderess. She might have failed
to spring to the bank of the hole for lack of the hand she had asked me
to reach out! Or her habit might have been entangled, so that she fell
short, and went to the bottom--to be found, one day, hardly changed, by
the side of her peat-embalmed steed!--no ill fitting fate for her, but a
ghastly thing to have a hand in!
She might, however, be on her way to Rising on foot! I told two of the
men to mount a pair of the horses, and go with me on the chance of
rendering her assistance.
We took the way to Rising, and had gone about two miles, when we saw her,
through the starlight, walking steadily along the track. I rode up to
her, and offered her one of the cart-horses: I would not have trusted my
Zoe with her any more than with an American lion that lives upon horses.
She declined the proffer with quiet scorn. I offered her one or both men
to see her home, but the way in which she refused their service, made
them glad they had not to go with her. We had no choice, therefore turned
and left her to get home as she might.
Not until we were on the way back, did it occur to me that I had not
asked Martha whether she knew anything about my uncle's departure. She
was never one to volunteer news, and, besides, would naturally think me
in his confidence!
I found she knew nothing of our expedition, as no one had gone into the
house--had only heard the horses and voices, and wondered. I was able to
tell her what had happened; but the moment I began to question her as to
any knowledge of my uncle's intentions, my strength gave way, and I burst
into tears.
"Don't be silly, Belorba!" cried Martha, almost severely. "You an engaged
young lady, and tied so to your uncle's apron-strings that you cry the
minute he's out of your sight! You didn't cry when Mr. Day left you!"
"No," I answered; "he was going only for a day or two!"
"And for how many is your uncle gone?"
"That is what I want to know. He means to be away a long time, I fear."
"Then it's nothing but your fancy sets you crying!--But I'll just see!"
she returned. "I shall know by the money he left for the house-keeping!
Only I won't budge till I see you eat."
Faint for want of food, I had no appetite. But I began at once to eat,
and she left me to fetch the money he had given her as he went.
She came back with a pocket-book, opened it, and looked into it. Then she
looked at me. Her expression was of unmistakable dismay. I took the
pocket-book from her hand: it was full of notes!
I learned afterward, that it was his habit to have money in the house, in
readiness for some possible sudden need of it.
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